Ode to Self

I took this pic alone

On a hot summer day in Jinhua.

No friends, no help, no time

To stop a Chinese person for once.

I didn’t expect the pic to be

so well lit and beautiful,

but all I could focus on

was that small amount of blur.

All I could wrap my mind around

is that no one was there to help,

how I was forced to turn on the timer

when someone could have taken it themselves.

Loneliness can creep on you

quicker than you believe,

but one thing you have to remember

is that one day it will leave.

It might take some time,

some conversations and a few dates

but once you get to know people

loneliness will walk away.

It will hop on a motorcycle

and drive away as fast as it can,

because it knows that you

have finally found a friend.

But is this really loneliness,

or just a moment in time

that I can rely on people I haven’t met

to make me smile wide.

To use this time well

to get to know myself better.

This might even be the best time

in this hot hot Shanghai weather.

What I see is not loneliness

just a time of self-discovery,

just a time of recovery,

just a time to be loving.

Not only loving to myself,

but to people I don’t know

because in a year’s time,

I’ll be right back at the beginning of this poem.

Loneliness, just an imaginary concept,

Ode to self, and love to others.

So when I graduate in 2019

and start a new life, I won’t be bothered.